I need to remind myself today of the qualities that make me wonderful. My friend hung up the phone with me last night and said: Take care of you. I lied to her and said I would. I lied because I really wasn't sure how to do that.
What does it mean?
I googled the phrase: How To Take Care Of Yourself and believe it or not there are concrete things I can do. The most prominent one that seemed to come up most often was to sit down and write a list of what makes you (me) unique and wonderful. My first reaction to that was: Come on… you must be kidding but then I realized that I had never made such a list or even thought about what qualities I might have that are worthy of respect, love and the love of a good person.
So here I go
I am loyal. I will stay by your side forever as long as I am treated well. You don't have to agree with me or share my interests, but I will be your friend forever. I will even remain your friend when you need to go away and not talk to me for awhile. I will listen to you when you come back.
When you do mean shitty things to me I will never stoop to your level and do mean shitty things to you back. I will simply move on and move away. I guess you can say I am not revengeful. That being said, sometimes I make decisions knowing full well that once the bridge has been crossed I can't go back. Sometimes this deliberateness is done to make sure I don't return to chaos.
I am funny. I'm really funny. I can take even the darkest episode and find the joke in it. I can make you laugh. I can make you laugh until the tears run down your face and equally I would say I have a good sense of humour.
I am a good cook and know know how to make tasty things from a world of menu's.
I throw excellent parties where everyone has fun, no one feels slighted and people make friends. I am very proud of this skill because it was not until recently that I discovered that this is a true knack. I did not recognize this skill in myself until I saw how miserable people where, myself included, at what other people defined as a party.
I have the most amazing set of lips a person could want. They are natural and I wear lipstick like a goddess.
I'm educated. I hold a MA. Most people can't say that.
I have a beautiful singing voice and I love to sing and I support and participate in Karaoke.
I listen fully when you need me to listen.
I give really good sound advice on a variety of topics. I can also just listen to you when you just want to talk.
I am direct and honest. Most people claim this trait but I am the real deal. I will hide nothing from you and all of it will be said with a loving heart but not necessarily the best tone. I am working on my tone, but you will never have to worry with me where you stand.
You can get angry at me without fear that I will leave.
I am not petty. Once I say what I need to say, I will not bring it up again unless you keep doing it like a broken record.
I argue fairly. I will never drag up ancient history when you are trying to deal with a problem now. I will not confuse issues or try and make you feel guilty for something in an attempt to get you to leave me alone. I'm not manipulative in this way.
I know how to give people privacy and I respect the right to space. I am not clingy.
I know how to make people feel comfortable. And I am also adept at making people uncomfortable. Both of these traits are good.
I am helpful and I genuinely care about how people are faring.
I know how to take care of you when you are sick and are the kind of person that wants to be left alone.
I am a lay musicologist and can introduce a person to some great new music.
I'm not a prude and you will find there is no subject I am not willing to talk about or discuss with you.
I think what is also interesting about this exercise is that while many (perhaps most) people will never hang around long enough to know any of your good qualities, you should know what they are. We should remind ourselves of how wonderful we are when people claim otherwise. In my humble opinion people tend not to like me because I am serious about engagement. I have no interest in talking about the weather but most people are comfortable at that level. I am never disliked once I am known and fleshed out. Most dismissals of me happen within minutes. Too, for me, there is a racial component: sometimes I am dismissed because the dismisser thinks they know all there is to know about people who look like me. It's a 'why bother' kind of thing.
I am proud of my qualities and achievements as you should be too. Write your own list and ponder what it means in the scope of your life.
What does it mean?
I googled the phrase: How To Take Care Of Yourself and believe it or not there are concrete things I can do. The most prominent one that seemed to come up most often was to sit down and write a list of what makes you (me) unique and wonderful. My first reaction to that was: Come on… you must be kidding but then I realized that I had never made such a list or even thought about what qualities I might have that are worthy of respect, love and the love of a good person.
So here I go
I am loyal. I will stay by your side forever as long as I am treated well. You don't have to agree with me or share my interests, but I will be your friend forever. I will even remain your friend when you need to go away and not talk to me for awhile. I will listen to you when you come back.
When you do mean shitty things to me I will never stoop to your level and do mean shitty things to you back. I will simply move on and move away. I guess you can say I am not revengeful. That being said, sometimes I make decisions knowing full well that once the bridge has been crossed I can't go back. Sometimes this deliberateness is done to make sure I don't return to chaos.
I am funny. I'm really funny. I can take even the darkest episode and find the joke in it. I can make you laugh. I can make you laugh until the tears run down your face and equally I would say I have a good sense of humour.
I am a good cook and know know how to make tasty things from a world of menu's.
I throw excellent parties where everyone has fun, no one feels slighted and people make friends. I am very proud of this skill because it was not until recently that I discovered that this is a true knack. I did not recognize this skill in myself until I saw how miserable people where, myself included, at what other people defined as a party.
I have the most amazing set of lips a person could want. They are natural and I wear lipstick like a goddess.
I'm educated. I hold a MA. Most people can't say that.
I have a beautiful singing voice and I love to sing and I support and participate in Karaoke.
I listen fully when you need me to listen.
I give really good sound advice on a variety of topics. I can also just listen to you when you just want to talk.
I am direct and honest. Most people claim this trait but I am the real deal. I will hide nothing from you and all of it will be said with a loving heart but not necessarily the best tone. I am working on my tone, but you will never have to worry with me where you stand.
You can get angry at me without fear that I will leave.
I am not petty. Once I say what I need to say, I will not bring it up again unless you keep doing it like a broken record.
I argue fairly. I will never drag up ancient history when you are trying to deal with a problem now. I will not confuse issues or try and make you feel guilty for something in an attempt to get you to leave me alone. I'm not manipulative in this way.
I know how to give people privacy and I respect the right to space. I am not clingy.
I know how to make people feel comfortable. And I am also adept at making people uncomfortable. Both of these traits are good.
I am helpful and I genuinely care about how people are faring.
I know how to take care of you when you are sick and are the kind of person that wants to be left alone.
I am a lay musicologist and can introduce a person to some great new music.
I'm not a prude and you will find there is no subject I am not willing to talk about or discuss with you.
I think what is also interesting about this exercise is that while many (perhaps most) people will never hang around long enough to know any of your good qualities, you should know what they are. We should remind ourselves of how wonderful we are when people claim otherwise. In my humble opinion people tend not to like me because I am serious about engagement. I have no interest in talking about the weather but most people are comfortable at that level. I am never disliked once I am known and fleshed out. Most dismissals of me happen within minutes. Too, for me, there is a racial component: sometimes I am dismissed because the dismisser thinks they know all there is to know about people who look like me. It's a 'why bother' kind of thing.
I am proud of my qualities and achievements as you should be too. Write your own list and ponder what it means in the scope of your life.
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